breasts

It’s funny how such simple things cause so much heartache.

They are too big. Too small. Too saggy. Too pointy. One’s bigger than the other. The areoles are too big. The areoles are too small. We push ‘em up. Strap ‘em down. Worry that people can see our over-the-shoulder-boulder-holders through our tops. Worry that we are showing too much cleavage. Worry that we’re not showing enough cleavage. Worry that our nipples are showing through our clothes.  Worry worry worry. Stress stress stress.

Most of the time, I am happy with my lot. But I have felt and been hurt by people who insinuate that, since I have a conventionally ‘nice’ figure (being skinny with a 34D bust), that I can’t possibly be a feminist.

Now, shit like that hurts. A lot.

I can’t help the way my body is. I don’t diet or obsess about my appearance. I didn’t have breast enlargement surgery. I didn’t ASK to look like this. So how, exactly, does the way I look damage my feminist credentials? Am I not really a part of the sisterhood unless I put weight on and wear baggy clothes to hide my bust and small waist? Because I happen to like my body the way it is, does that mean I am a tool of the patriarchy?

And, what’s more, according to the masses I can’t possibly be a feminist because that would mean I would have to have a brain, and - come on! - women with larger than average breasts certainly aren’t intelligent! Big tits = air headed bimbo. They’re sluts. They’re whores. They must want sex from every man they see. And, god help them if there is the slightest indication of nipple showing through their tops! Good god, they really are asking for it then!

(To the next dickhead who assumes that because a woman’s nipple is showing through her top that she must be trying to get him into bed, think about this : 100% of the population have nipples. But 100% of the population CERTAINLY do not want to get you into bed.)

And, you know something? I like pretty clothes. I like tops with ribbons and floral patterns and strappy bits. I see my friend (with a 34B chest) wearing a pretty top and it makes her look cute. But I know that if I wear it, then I will look like a ‘slut’ because I have a larger chest. Who the hell decided this was the rule? Why should I have to worry about looking ‘stupid’ and like a ‘slut’ because someone decided that a woman with certain sized mammory glands is biologically their intellectual inferior?!?

This is the worry that I have. But I know that women at the other end of the scale have their own worries also. Many of these women think they have to stuff their bras and play dumb to attract men. Somehow, they are led to believe that all their problems will magically disappear once they have cosmetic surgery on their breasts. And then, when they have had the surgery, they worry that men won’t LIKE fake breasts and that they must keep the fact that theirs are surgically enhanced a SECRET.

Why are so many women prisoners of the lumps of fat on our chests? Why do they rule our lives so much?

We need to STOP worrying about them so much. We need to love them the way they are and for what the are. Breasts are great! They are provide free milk to our beautiful babies. They feel nice to touch. Nipples are fantastic and sensitive and, when stimulated, can make us feel warm and tingly inside.

I found a great website a while back with a “gallery of normal breasts” showing pictures of various shapes, sizes and types of breasts. I know many women who have looked at those pictures and felt much more at ease with their own bodies. Most of the time, the only breasts we women ever see are the surgically enhanced (or airbrushed) ones from pornography - so to see that, in fact, most boobs don’t look like that is a great relief to many women.

(I can’t find the link to that site now! Grr. If anyone knows what I am talking about , then can you please let me know the URL?)